Cullen

I need you to help me organize a posse.

We're going to track down this newborn's father, and we're going to take away his man card.

Who's with me?

I like Twilight and I'm not ashamed to admit it, but here's the deal; naming your kid after momentary pop culture icons is just maybe not the best idea ever. For instance, I'm not going to run out and get a Jacob tattoo (although I do have a wolf on my ankle, he is named after Cafall from The Grey King and can in no way be tied in to Twilight). Yesterday I considered a Fluttershy tattoo, but the pony/brony phenomenon will probably be fleeting, and will I really want that when I'm 90?

It's the same thing. When this kid gets to be a teenager and his friends find out he's named after Twilight, well... let's just go get than man card from his dad so the poor kid can have two when he grows up.

He'll need them.