Saturday, February 20, 2010


I got this one off the back of a minivan, from one of those stickers that advertises every member of the family.

Like this:

Ahh... I love that sticker.

Anyway, this poor mite is named Laken, and as usual, I tried to follow the thought process of the adult who did the naming.

(You know it's a bad name when your spell checker objects, by the way.)

So maybe it's someone who didn't quite want to follow the Jayden trend. Commendable.

Then, perhaps, they thought of the Jayden alternative, Kalen.

(Always makes me think of kale, than name...)

So I suppose that they thought perhaps Kalen was slightly too trendy. The obvious thing to do, to them, was to switch the K and L around. Taa-daa! It's not Jayden, it's not Kalen, but it's just as frickin' stupid. Although I'm sure the parents gave themselves quite a pat on the back for cuteness and originality.

Or am I barking up the wrong tree here... is it pronounced a totally different way? Is it not lay'ken, after all, but rather la-ken'? God, that would be even worse. Laken doll. Heh.

Well, Laken with a long A is bad... Laken with a short A is much, much worse. I hope young Laken got off lightly (relatively) and got the long A.

And remember, people, creative spellings will cause creative pronunciations. Keep this in mind.

(I hope this kid's mother doesn't read my blog and start beating me over the head in the grocery store or something. I gotta find some bad names that are from out of the area.)


  1. Arilyn always sets off the spell checker, unless of course you have added it, as does Shevaun. I doubt either of them would want their names spelled differently, or for that matter want different names. We chose the traditional English spelling for Shevaun's name, as opposed to the Gaelic Siobhan, specifically to try to avoid people mispronouncing it, but apparently even that is too difficult for many folks.

    OK, fair enough, I gave my last three kids names that were perhaps outside of the norm, at least when they were named, but even Emma's name proved difficult for her t-ball coach. Known during her 48" and shorter years as Emma Cate, we thought we were safe from people not being able to pronounce or spell her name. Granted, 26 years ago the name Emma was not even a blip on the popular baby name list, but we still figured that it was easy enough to read, pronounce and spell. Then Emma Cate received a trophy from her t-ball team and her name was spelled Ima Cake. Yeah. We still tease her about that...

  2. Oh lord, I didn't mean your kids. Your kids have awesome names and I'd like to steal Shevaun's name and Rory's both. And Arilyn is a great name. I was just snarking along and Laken kept setting off the spellchecker so I thought I'd snark about that.

    If it makes you feel any better, when I type my name on the blackberry it's first suggestion is always Tarantula.

    Also, I just found out I've been mispronouncing Miranda's middle name, Aisling. (As Ashling instead of Ashlin.)

  3. i wish i could make this up (and no idea where to post it) but when i lived in albuquerque a friend of mine's godchild was named...legally...i wish i could make this up...(actually, lets strike the word "friend", acquaintance)...

    Sexy DeJesus or if my memory is failing me, it was Sexy DeJour - either way, yes, that would be a one-year old pimp's birthday party i attended in 1998

    but yeah, who names their son SEXY?

    great blog, btw

  4. wait....we have an official facebook confirmation from a girlfriend that was at the same party....

    our dearest Sexxi Dejour Versace [last name] has turned 13, and aparently has become...(and i quote)..."a rapper"

    and i better quote my girlfriend..."whatever the hell that means"

  5. I know a baby named Laken. She's a girl. I wonder if this is her?